Home and a Plan

I'm gonna make this short. Mostly because my computer has to sit on my belly and it hurts so much from stretching that I can't stand having it sit here for too long.

I came home on Monday. It's been nice to relax on the couch and eat regular food. I feel so much better eating protein again. Sleeping on the other hand has been a nightmare. At the hospital I could prop the bed up so the babies could get out of my lungs at night, at home I can't do that to the bed and I am up all night just tossing and turning and hoping I get comfortable enough to get a couple hours of sleep. Okay tossing and turning is not exactly what I'm doing, in order for me to turn over on my opposite side I have to practically give myself a pep talk "Okay Megan, you can do this, it's just turning over....Okay good attempt this time lets try a little harder. Phew okay you did it. Now you might as well get up and go to the bathroom. WTH! Why aren't your legs working?!?! Well just don't fall over cause there is no way your gonna get up off the floor if you can't even roll over!!". So that basically happens 5 times during the night.

I'm being induced September 30th at 6am via a small dose of pitocin and breaking my water. I will be exactly 36 weeks. I'm hoping for no nicu time but I know it's a possibility and am prepared for that. I'm slightly hoping to go into labor on my own before then, but at the same time I know that anything before 36 weeks is mandatory 24 hour nicu observation. My nursery is a total wreck and nothing is ready for the babies. I don't know what I'm going to do if I have a csection because I have so much that I need to do in this house. I may ask to be taken off bedrest at the end of next week just so I can get a few things ready. I have almost everything I need, but nothing is washed so it can't be used yet. I was planning on having until at least 32 weeks to get things ready and then I thought if I happened to have the twins too early I would at least have time to get things done while they were in the nicu. I never in 1,000,000 years thought I would be on strict bed rest starting at 28 weeks and ending at a delivery time where they would be big enough to take home. If I had to do it all over again, I would have gotten things ready so much faster, but who plans on this?

That's basically all my news. I have two appointments next week and I need to pack my bags before those appointments. Even after all of this, I don't have a bag packed. lol. 

It's small but this is my countdown board that we updated everyday.

Going Home

34 weeks

Not horrible, but not great either.

Short post because I'm actually emotionally not doing well so I'm keeping things short and to the point right now.
The girls have been taking forever to pass their bpp's ever since 28 weeks. http://www.webmd.com/baby/biophysical-profile-bpp That link will talk about what a bpp is. They pass everything except breathing. My high risk dr said that once they get older they should pass those easily. This has not been the case. Avalee (B) passed last time easily but after 30 minutes Aubree still didn't breath and failed. or got a 6/8 which is a C. After that you need to do an NST to see if the girls will pass the NST http://americanpregnancy.org/prenataltesting/non-stresstest.html. The girls are also failing their NST's which means Aubrey got a 6/10 which is failing.  They seem to be sleeping a lot I guess but I talked to the Dr about possible placenta breakdown today and he said that's a possibility. We have checked fluid levels and done dopplers on the cords so we know that they cords are okay. We just don't know why they fail or it takes forever (over 1 hour) to pass a test when they are 32.3 weeks old. These tests should be easy to pass.

So according to my doctor there is no real concern to take them out just yet. They are just too little, but if this continues we will try to squeeze out as much time as possible when they are inside me and then we will get them out. Dr doesn't think that will be at 36 weeks the way things are going. He thinks more like 34. I'm still hoping for 35, but if things continue like this then I will start thinking more and more about pushing for an immediate delivery. It's reassuring that things don't look horrible on the NST, but not reassuring enough because with monochorionic twins there are a variety of things that can go wrong. The girls move all the time, but just not seeing the heart rate increase with the movement. So we will deliver soon, whether it be because my uterus gives out or because the girls aren't safe in there anymore.

The stress is really getting to me right now and I keep getting letters that require action right away (such as being denied medical coverage for my hospital stay, Mason's medicaid being taken away, a bill for some testing that was done here when we didn't know the doctor wasn't affiliated with this hospital but a hospital in Kansas and my coverage doesn't extend to Kansas). Not to mention missing out on months of Mason's life. So that's where things are at right now.

32 weeks. Woo-flippin-hoo

Break out the champagne (Or sparking grape juice)  because I've now reached one of the biggest goal a twin mom can achieve. Only babies aren't supposed to be born at 32 weeks now are they? They will still have to be in the nicu for a long time. So why is it such a big goal? I guess babies born at 32 weeks do just as well as babies born full term in life. But they still have to go to the nicu and that doesn't set well with me.

So how am I feeling?! Like I have 2 32 week babies inside me that's how. (forgive me for being short today, I'm trying to sit up long enough to update before my back gets way to sore for me to sit anymore. Then I will lay down and pretty soon my hips will get too sore for me to lay down and it will just be a vicious cycle until I take Ambien tonight and get 3 hours of sleep before I'm sore again.) And that pretty much sums up how I'm feeling. I think I would feel better if I was allowed to go outside and swim a little. Now I know why twin moms are told to swim, because it takes the weight off. Speaking of weight, I haven't gained a single pound in a month, but the twins are growing like crazy so I guess that means I'm not eating enough to keep up with their nourishment and mine as well which would explain why I feel so miserable. But the food here is horrible, and since I have GD I have to eat very small portions of the regular meals they serve here. How dare they be asked to serve different food to people with diabetes, just serve the same food only make the potions extra small. Yeah that works. My blood sugar has been all over the place. First it's too high so they put me on meds to keep it down, now it's tending to be to low so they have to get me to eat something to get it back up again. So I eat something and then it's high again. My BP is also very low in the morning so I can't take my heart medication. Today it was 90/49.

Just a quick update since I'm starting to feel sick again, I'm contracting a lot. The ones that scare me are the ones that don't hurt. This is from a few days ago (my last contraction episode) 

They were coming 2 min apart. Not sure when I took this pic. They started to space out to 3 min so I'm not sure if this was taken when they were 2 min or when they were starting to space out. I was given IV fluid and they slowed down enough for everyone to be comfortable with where they were at. What hurts is when contractions don't show up on the monitor, just irritability. Irritability hurts so bad and what's frustrating is that nothing shows up so no one can figure out why I'm in so much pain except that my uterus just freaks out for awhile. Tomorrow I will know more because my doctor is back in the office.

That's all I can really update right now since my back is starting to hurt from sitting up. Maybe tomorrow I will know more. I also think I get a growth scan tomorrow.